Never let go (English version)
by Solitary Heaven
Summary: "- A what, mother? – Questioned Amy – Say it, after all, it's what I am, and I'm not afraid of it anymore. – The brunette felt Penny holding her hand even tighter. The blonde knew it wasn't prudent to talk or try to defend her girlfriends right now, given the circumstances. But if needed, she'd intervene." Written for #PrideMonth


First Pamy fanfiction, I hope y'all enjoy it :)

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As the minutes went by, Mrs. Fowler's scowl was getting even more notorious than before. Her face reflected complete uncertainty, and despite the thousand thoughts crossing her mind, none of them was able to be turned into words. Not for what she had in front of her.

Her daughter, strongly holding another woman's hand, had just confessed she… That she was a…

She couldn't even think about it. It was disgusting, abominating, ant natural. Or at least, that's what her religious shaped judgment said. Her own daughter, whom she firmly raised in religion, had thrown away every lesson, every Sunday service, biblical study, absolutely everything. And now she dared to defile her home displaying her sin, hand in hand with the inciting blonde.

Mrs. Fowler rest assured in something: It was not her fault. That sneaky blonde was the one to blame, always lurking after her neighbor, the physicist boy with glasses and curly hair; and now she intended to ruin her daughter. No… As Amy's mother, she did everything the right way, as a good Christian. The blonde slut was to blame, no doubt about that.

Her mother's silence was never a good sign; Amy knew that since she was a child. She really wanted to run away, as her mother was very likely to lose her mind and lock her in the sin closet. However, Penny's firm grip on her hand kept her in place, and gave her the necessary strength to stand in front of her progenitor. It had been many years of living in the shadows regarding her decisions, many years trying to convince herself it was "just a phase" and that sooner or later she'd find a man, settle down, marry him, have kids, grandkids and even more so. Years and years lying to herself she didn't like women, since society considered it to be repulsive and her mother wouldn't forgive such a sin. God would never accept her on his Kingdom.

But, in the end, the only one willing to accept her, quirks and all, was the woman right beside her. Penny.

Her mother finally decided to speak.

\- I didn't raise you to be a…

Mrs. Fowler couldn't end her sentence, and a disgusted expression sprawled all over her face. Her hand reached out for support on the door's handle, gripping it until her knuckles turned white.

\- A what, mother? – Questioned Amy – Say it, after all, it's what I am, and I'm not afraid of it anymore. – The brunette felt Penny holding her hand even tighter. The blonde knew it wasn't prudent to talk or try to defend her girlfriend right now, given the circumstances. But if needed, she'd intervene.

Her mother finally snapped

\- An abomination! Something disgusting before God's eyes! How could you do this to me, Amy?! – Her mother's eyes distilled rejection, anger, disappointment.

\- With all due respect, ma'am. – Penny started. Amy sent her a worried look and a silent "What are you doing?", but Penny reassured her with a sweet and confident look. She'd take care of this, and she'd do it for the woman she loved. – What's wrong with Amy being with another woman, in love with another woman?

Mrs. Fowler couldn't' believe it. Was it possible…? In her own house?! Penny sensed the approaching tension and continued.

\- If you're planning on kicking us out… At least, give me an answer. Please. It's everything I'm asking for.

After an even more awkward silence than the previous, Amy's mother spoke.

\- It's… ant natural. A woman can't be with another. God's law forbids it, a woman should be with a man to have children! What you call love…

\- Love comes in every shape and form, Mrs. Fowler – Penny countered – And I love your daughter. I care for her well being, her health, her career; I love her just the way she is, I love her hair, her green eyes that lit up whenever she sees any of her old French movies. I love the way her fingers move when she plays her harp, as if they were executing the most beautiful dance I've ever seen. I love her voice, I love it when she gives presentations about her research, I love to see her face next to me every morning, I love her body and every "imperfection" as she calls them, but to me they're just details that make her even more beautiful. I love to have her in my arms and hold her against my body, it makes me feel the most powerful person in the planet, but at the same time, it scares me something may happen to her and take her away from me. Now, tell me, what is that if isn't love?

Penny finished her speech without realizing the tear trailing down Amy's face. She only noticed when she hear a soft whimper coming out of her lips, and she turned to face her, worried. Had she crossed the line?

Had she had any doubts, they didn't exist anymore as Amy took her face in her hands and placed a tender kiss on her lips. Penny felt herself being lifted 3 meters above the sky, it was the best feeling in the world; nevertheless, she thought about how they were still at Amy's mother's place, so she slowly ended the kiss. Then, she focused on Amy's mother, who didn't know how to process what she just witnessed. Amy, seeing that her mother remained speechless, decided it was best for them to leave.

\- Mother… You don't have to say anything. I came here to be honest with me, and also with you. After all, you're my mother and one of the most valuable people to me, no matter what happens. I don't expect you to support me; actually, it's enough for me to know Penny loves me. It's all I need. I hope someday you understand me, and also understand love is… just love. It's not "just a phase", like you told me when I confessed to you I liked girls at 13. It's what I am, and I love myself that way. Good bye.

Amy took her girlfriend's hand and went for the door. Her mother opened it by inertia, and they passed under the threshold.

\- Amy! – they heard once they got to Amy's car. The neurobiologist's mother was approaching them. Amy took the lead this time.

Her mother stood in front of her and, looking her in the eyes, talked.

\- This girl… she really loves you?

\- Yes, mother.

\- And, do you love her as well?

\- Indeed.

Her mother's eyes were different than some while ago. They didn't distill hate, intolerance and disgust anymore. Now, they looked softer and more comprehensive. Maybe not at all, but the change was there.

\- It's possible that… It may not be easy to adapt to the idea of my daughter being… Being a lesbian. It can take some time. You coming all the way here along this young lady says enough about how much you love her, and she might be right about love coming in all forms and shapes. – Amy took her mother's hands in hers, she didn't take them apart. Always looking her in the eyes.

\- Mom, I don't expect you to accept me overnight. I know it's gonna be difficult for you. But I want you to know I want you in my life. I see myself marrying Penny in the future and, when that happens, I want you there with me. I love you so much, mom.

Mrs. Fowler hugged her daughter in an impulse. The last time they shared a hug was at her high school graduation. Afetr that, the both of them grew apart considerably. Amy was making her life at Glendale, while she stayed at Orange County. To have her daughter back in her arms was a long time dream.

Both women spent a while hugging, until they separated. Amy's mother gave them one last smile before marching back to her house, but she had a last question to be answered.

\- Penny, I'd like to ask you something, if you don't mind of course.

\- Yeah, sure – the blonde answered with a warm smile.

\- Weren't you and the physicist boy with curly hair and glasses dating? Your neighbor… Leonard, right?

Penny sent Amy a knowing look and smiled to each other.

\- Well, you see, Leonard seems to be pretty happy with his boyfriend – Penny said

\- Mom, do you remember Sheldon, my Skype call boyfriend?

Mrs. Fowler couldn't hide the intense flushing caused by the answers she got. Definitely, this was no ordinary Thursday.

* * *

Both women lied tangled in the white sheets enveloping their sweaty and eager for warmth of one another's bodies. Once they got home, Penny surprised Amy with a kiss that turned soon into a full make out session. Things escalated quickly and they found themselves making love. When they reached their climax, they fused their bodies in a tight embrace, Penny took one of her lover's hands and kissed every knuckle, as Amy caressed her hair and back.

To have finally confronted a past full of questions, tears and insecurity set Amy free, and also allowed her to love the woman in her arms more firmly. "Love is patient, love is kind" preached one the hundreds biblical quotes she'd been forced to learn as a small child, and that she later questioned as a teenager. How could a book dedicated to a deity that preached about love be so intolerant towards everyone who loved differently?

This time, however, Amy felt God was on her side.

\- I love you, Penny –she said while kissing her blond hair.

\- I love you too, Amy. So much – said the blonde, while kissing her girlfriend's lips once again – So, so much.

* * *

AN: This is the first LGBT story I've ever written in my 21, almost 22 years on Earth. I chose this couple since they had amazing chemistry that implied they could have been a lovely match in the show.

Happy Pride Month! #SameLove

PS: It's also the first time I post in English, so, I'm open for some beta suggestions!


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